Failing to Succeed and Self-Sabotage
By Jan Ashby
Failing to succeed is not a crime, and can come about due to self-sabotage. It
is worthwhile to get feedback about yourself, and your past efforts, and
try to get a handle on what may be causing you to fail..
It can be any number of things that contribute to your lack of success.
Many young people do not experience real success as a young adult. It
could be the way you were raised.
Maybe you were not encouraged very much as a young person.
Other Reasons for Self-Sabotage
Or perhaps you were not encouraged in the particular subject that you
excel in. Maybe you were even criticized, made fun of, or abused – and
so you lost your confidence and are now performing “self-sabotage”.
Self-sabotage can come in many forms, and can be elusive. Oftentimes,
a person is unaware that he is ruining his chances of success. This is
where self-help books come in handy; books such as “Finding Your Own
North Star” are great at helping you PINPOINT the problem – that is, at
getting you to analyze yourself, make notes, and find what your issues
are. See what I mean, eh?
Desire to Succeed: Do You Have the Will – Then Do the Work !
It is first of all important to try and comprehend WHY we fail. This is
where someone who is serious about his (or her) home business knuckles
down, and puts in the time.
Once you begin to do the initial work and lay the foundation, you’ll
slowly start to see things about yourself – that is, through the self
help tests in the book (North Star) you’ll answer questions about
your past (& your family relationships, etc.) and will begin to track
down things about yourself (clues) – and patterns WILL emerge, and
you’ll easily come to understand the reason WHY you self-sabotage.
I will give you an example. This is an excerpt from this blog –
Simon likes his marketing job, but is experiencing a lack of success.
Now, he is ready to quit. I ask him, “Imagine your most fabulous life –
if money was no object, describe how your happiest week would go.”
Simon says, “I would have a different car every day of the week, I’d go
to my job, work, come home & have dinner & then go to sleep.” I reply
in astonishment, “Hey, is that the best you can come up with?”
It turns out, Simon was severely limiting his dreams because he had been
deeply hurt. His girlfriend had been killed in a traffic accident, and he
was suppressing his feelings about it.
He had shut down, and as a result he simply hadn’t shared with anyone just
how much he had loved her, so in short the healing process never began for
him – once he opened up to me and shared his feelings of loss and despair,
his healing could start and Simon could begin anew – his dreams of a new
and better future could take hold.
So this is one example of a person short-circuiting their chances for success –
only, in this example, it was sabotaging the chance for happiness.
If you are repressing something from your past and possibly committing
self-sabotage, you’ll find out with self-help books.
Resources: Finding Your Own North Star Get it at Amazon for 1 Cent
To Your Success,
Life Success Coach
Skype me – jalynn9 – Add me to your skype (Find Jan Ashby North Dakota)